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(no subject) [Aug. 28th, 2006|10:22 am]
Okay, so, I lied. I'm just going to protect all of my entries. Every single one. So... Leave a comment and I will add you. Rawr.
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(no subject) [Aug. 27th, 2006|12:45 am]
I'm moving elsewhere. Leave me a comment if you want to know where to find me.

Peace.
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a beach truth [Jul. 22nd, 2006|08:39 pm]
[feeling | pensive]
[stuck in head |0ur finest year :: better than ezra]

I think I discovered one of those beach truths today. I was just sitting there kind of hazed out, watching some little kids play in the waves, and it came to me that they look just like the bigger boys farther out. The waves were the exact same person-size-to-wave-size ratio for both. So essentially it was the same magnitude for the little boys as it was for the teenagers and grown men. So isn’t it true, then, that the experiences and problems we have as a child are just as monumental, just as big and important, as the ones we have as an adult? And isn’t it also true that a lot of adults ignore or minimize the problems of a child like a guy who’s 6” would just shrug off a little teeny wave? Even though to the child it is a big deal. Little Tommy would be just as heartbroken when Suzy, the girl he is madly in love with on the playground, runs away from him when he tries to kiss her as big Tommy would be when Suzanne leaves him for the guy from the hot dog place. You know?

I don’t know, maybe that’s all crap that I just pulled out of my bum when I was in a sun-induced coma (I did manage to get some nice burns today) but it makes sense to me. It justifies that my experiences do mean something to me, to my life, that they are significant, even if it’s only for the moment.
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survey! [Jul. 20th, 2006|05:47 am]
[feeling | rejuvenated]

I love the beach. Having water forced in my nose, throat, and ears. Smelling like salt water. Coming home and deciding it would be a bad idea to take off my bathing suit before getting in the shower because if I did the pound of sand would be all over the floor. Brushing seaweed out of my hair. Trying to blow water out my nose and having it come out my ears. Good times, gooood times.

No, really, I do love the beach. Karl's coming down tomorrow for two days, so that should be... interesting. And if "Beryl" fucks up the rest of my week, I will cry. Quite a bit.

Anyone want to start a podcast with me? My laptop is begging for one and my dad is crazy about them (he read a book and he thinks he knows everything) so I think I'll look into it. Maybe a Diva one. So a survey: if the Divas did a live podcast, would you listen? Let me know.
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(no subject) [Jul. 19th, 2006|01:50 am]
Mom: You know, we didn't buy you this expensive laptop so you could take DVDs out from the library and rip them.

Me: I know, it's just a happy bonus.

That Ocean County Library Card we paid for it is really proving it's worth. w00t.
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(no subject) [Jul. 17th, 2006|09:03 pm]
[feeling | peaceful]
[stuck in head |0ur finest year :: better than ezra]

1. Grab the nearest book. (Don't search around and look for the "coolest" book you can find. Do what's actually next to you.)
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.

"If it happened to me, I suppose I would," said the man." --The Talisman by Stephen King and Peter Straub

Yeah, I've decided to read that again because I bought the sequel a few weeks ago for like $3 but I can't remember anything about The Talisman itself. Ho hum.

Erf, I have 6 ENORMOUS mosquito bites. I haven't been bitten this badly in YEARS. It looks like I'm sprouting extra ankle bones from various points on my calves. Oh excuse me, 7. There's a little tiny one right next to one of the big ones that I hadn't seen. Argh!!! Bless topical anestetics. Dermoplast is my savior.

In other news, I succeeded in being not burned on my first day on the beach. That's probably because I was only down there for about an hour and a half, but don't really care. I got a little red in my "chestal area", the part that never really gets any sun and apparently got only lightly smothered in my spf 15, but it doesn't really hurt much or anything, so I'm not counting it. I only stayed there for an hour an a half because it was literally hot as hell here yesterday and the humidity was impressive. Normally one rectifies this by going in the water, but I haven't been to the beach in 2 years (the day at Barcelona notwithstanding) and I'd completely forgotten that freshly shaved legs sting like all hell in salt water.

So today I think I'm going to spend some quality time on my deck with Mr's King & Straub and then maybe I shall go to the beach or do some shopping (on foot). After dinner I'm biking down to Sunset Point to take pictures and then I'm getting up really early to watch the sun rise and take more pictures. And I'll probably find the time to run to CVS and buy Benadryl so I can actually sleep tonight. And a gluestick. I need a gluestick.
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yay f0r the l0ng beachy island! [Jul. 16th, 2006|09:13 pm]
[feeling | n0t awake]
[stuck in head |chase the stars :: the third life]

So yay! I'm down on LBI! I haven't been here in 2 years, and boy is it good to be back. When I finish my first big film, the first thing I'm buying is a McMansion down here. Gosh, I love it. Yum.

Yesterday I woke up and did breakfast with Karl. He told me about a whackjob he gave his number to at work who called him within 30 minutes of him giving said number, and who is so forward that any girl paying any attention knows it's code for desperate. Which is kind of funny, because it just proves my theory that he's a whackjob magnet. I gave him my diagnosis and explained my success rate in predicting such things and told him he's not allowed to date her. And he was like, "Okay good, now when I stop talking to her and she asks why, I can tell her I'm not allowed to see her anymore because Angela says so." Exactly!

Then I packed and set up my printer all at the same time. I swore mightily at it (the printer) several times, but figured it all out in the end. It's a pretty sweet little printer. Yum yum. Then we drove to my grandmothers and dropped off Molly and then we were on our way.

The traffic was awful coming down, but I had my darling little iPod (whose name is Monkey, by the way, and yes, it was specifically so I could dance around singing "This is me and my Monkey") with me, bless it's little microprocessor. Listened to a bunch of stuff that I'd had on my computer for ages and never got around to listening to, like some Indigo Girls, a little Fall Out Boy, etc.etc. It was on random so I just let it go. I particularly enjoyed one song off a CD that I bought from the band themselves in a subway in Boston two winters ago that I had always kind of liked because it was pretty. I actually listened to the words though, yesterday, and I was touched. Made me start thinking. Scary, I know. Don't worry, the sensation didn't last too long, some Spamalot came and banished it. Foof.

So here. I scrapbooked for a bit, we had dinner, and then we went for a walk on the beach. Which turned into a hike of multiple blocks, which is not fun to do on dry sand. My calves were like, "WTF? What the hell are you doing, asshole?" We walked down to Aunt Ollies to get ice cream, but the line was out the door and we all kind of didn't want ice cream anymore, so we walked all the way back to Shipbottom and got slurpoees at the 7-11 instead. Hee hee. And then last night I slept like a rock. And since I didn't have my cellphone (which also serves as my watch) with me in the room, I couldn't tell what time it was and I thought it was late, so I made myself get up. And it was only 9 and change. I was like, "Goddammittttt!" etc. etc.

Saw you standin' there, just a hangin' around
Didn't know what to say, how to make a sound
How to cross the line back to where we were
It seemed to awefully far away, even if we couldn't stay
It'd be nice for awhile

We could chase the stars for a million miles
All across the Milky Way, even if we couldn't stay
It'd be nice for awhile

But that's how it goes, the way our story's told
We could never fill the space set between our goals
And you've got your life and I've got mine too
Couldn't hide it anymore, it was time to close the door
And to rewrite the page

We could chase the stars for a million miles
All across the Milky Way, even if we couldn't stay
It'd be nice for awhile

So every now and then when I look back to the end
I'll rewind for awhile
'Cause it seems to me everything you want to say
Is nothin'; that I try to make it mine and
Cross that distant line, but the way that it's goin' I know
It'll be just fine

The sun keep's a risin' and souls realizin' that I
Can make it, time can only take it, so every now and then
I'll rewind for awhile

We could chase the stars for a million miles
All across the Milky Way, even if we couldn't stay
It'd be nice for awhile
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(no subject) [Jul. 15th, 2006|01:09 am]
[feeling | c0mplacent]
[stuck in head |get the j0ke :: r0bbie williams]

I am laughing my ass off right now. I found my journal from Europe yesterday which enabled me to continue my Europe scrapbook. I'm going through typing up the bits I need for the scrapbook and I came across and entry I wrote from my hotel room in Zurich. I'd been watching BBC's top ten of the week or whatever they call it and I'd jotted down some names of artists I'd liked so I could download their stuff when I got back to America. The list is as follows:

-Texas
-McFly
-Daniel Powter

This is even more ironic because I was thinking that I really ought to go download the rest of that album later. Sorry, but that amused me.

So yeah, I'm back into the scrapbooking swing of things. I put my grad party book together (it's insanely cute) and now I'm stuck in the middle of the eternal debate: do I continue on with my Europe books or do the Graduation scrapbook first? The Grad one will take a lot less time and I'm thinking I should do it while it's all still fresh in my mind, but it's almost a year for Europe stuff. So who knows. Actually, I think it's a year tomorrow I left. Yeah, it is. Huh. Weird.
Yesterday I spent the morning running errands, which included blowing an entire paycheck at Michaels and A.C. Moore. Then I dug all of the yarn out of my room (there was SOO MUCH) and sorted into individual baggies by project, that way when I finish something I can just go grab another bag and it will be a surprise! And then I went to Cheesecake Factory with Alexis which was awesome because it was punctuated by boys' drama (via phone and text) and because I could eat anything I wanted and not feel guilty because I hadn't eaten anything all day. Literally. I've stopped eating breakfast because no matter what I eat my mother yells at me and I just got so caught up I forgot about lunch and snacking. So yeah. Was all good. We made a trip into B&N too, where I acquired two Clive Cussler books as well as another called How To Aggravate a Man Every Time (And Have Him Beg For Mercy). I'm excited.

Other things are good. Work's a bummer this week because of the goddam sales and all that shit. It's so freaking stressful, and not helped by my completely random bout of PMS even though it's like a week late. *shrug* Karl is still being strange, but I don't really care anymore. Greg is just being so completely fucked up, all drama-y and whiny and he's not usually that way. He's "confused" because apparently I keep calling him an asshole and this is offensive. But anyone who knows me very well knows I swear like a pirate all the time and when I call one of my friends that I'm joking 99% of the time. Seriously. Ask Shoji. Or Mattie. Or Karl. Whatever, man. He's "trying" you know, and this is why he's upset, apparently. Whatever, "trying" doesn't make up for being a complete jackass to me for a whole freaking year, give me a break.

So yeah, now I'm going to finish typing these up and at least finish the pages I'd started before I lost the journal (which was in one of the bags of yarn under my desk, funnily enough) and... then I'll figure out what to do. Whatever. Down LBI all next week. If you want to reserve a day to come down and visit, call me!

Sometimes you've got to get the joke
It's the only thing that keeps this boat afloat
Who put this chainsaw in my spokes?
I can't change how it's wrote
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(no subject) [Jul. 12th, 2006|10:08 am]
I just took a quiz from CosmoGirl that says I'm too quiet and I should open up and loosen up around guys and maybe let them see how great I am at "telling stories". 

I found it amusing to say the very least.
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(no subject) [Jul. 10th, 2006|11:48 pm]
[feeling | l0nely]

So yay! Italy won! I really only needed to see the first and last ten minutes each of the game, though, because it was like, the most boring soccer game ever other than that. Which is sad because it's the freaking world cup. But whatever.

Nothing significant has happened at all. I've been working a lot, which is good. The girls are lots of fun, especially on Saturday when all the assholes came out to play. Seriously. Like this one guy who returned almost $200 worth of stuff (off a reciept of almost twice that all paid for in cash) who kept telling me how slow I was, why couldn't I move faster, it was so easy, who cleaned out my register of everything but a few fives and singles, and who was basically a completely huge asshole that left me and Nareliss talking about him for the rest of the day.

But that's basically it. *shrug* I need to do more things with people, but everyone's so busy. It's depressing. So I spend lots of quality time with my hot new laptop. w00t.
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(no subject) [Jul. 8th, 2006|09:49 am]
[feeling | tired]
[stuck in head |summer, highland falls :: billy j0el]

Yay! I made a global BCA Choir group on FaceBook and it's making me so freakin' happy. Karl was mad that I wouldn't invite him, though. Loser.

So yeah, Karl and I got into our first real argument today. We were at the Arena and for some reason -- no, I remember, Karl was trying to convince me that it was okay to like Abercrombie because it was popular among the gay community, stupid boy, but anyway -- were discussing GLBT rights. He was making me SO FREAKING MAD because he would counter my arguments with the stupidest crap and then when he felt he was losing he would switch to a different part of the debate. Trying to tell me that marriage's only purpose is to procreate and backing it up with even if he fell in love with a girl and he wanted to be with her forever and crap and then he found out she couldn't have kids, he wouldn't marry her. I was like, Oh yeah, that would fly with her really really well, she'd totally understand that. It was really funny to see his face when I told him I was never planning on having kids because I can't stand them. Funny in a weird way. And he was like, "I don't feel that gay people should impose their will and disrupt our society so they can get married, which they shouldn't because marriage is only to have kids." And I really wanted to hit him. We wound up not speaking to each other for about 15 minutes, after which he tried to make small talk. What I kept trying to tell him was that all the GLBT community wants is for people like him and the church to leave them alone and let them do what they want with their lives because it's really they who are imposing their doctrine on others. They're denying these couples the same rights that everyone is supposed to be allowed and when the couples feel prejudiced against, well, who can really blame them? He's so closeminded about some things, it's really his biggest fault.

But happier things. I saved a birdie yesterday at work! It was sitting in the middle of the sidewalk in shock and it would have got run over. No one else wanted to really get close to it so I grabbed 2 foamie visors and scooped him up and put him by the bushes around one of the lamppost pilings. He flew away a little while later. And I saw Pirates last night; it was pretty good overall, although there were bits I didn't like. Like I totally don't buy the whole Jack-Sparrow-roaring-and-holding-his-sword-up-nobly-as-the-Kraken-eats-him thing. Really reaslly corny. I just love how Disney has made a multi-million dollar movie deal out of a crappy ride at Disney World. Really impressive.

So we'll argue and we'll compromise
And realize that nothing's ever changed
For all our mutual experience
Our separate conclusions are the same
How thoughtlessly we dissapate our energies
Perhaps we don't fulfil each other's fantasies
So we stand upon the ledges of our lives
With our respective similarities
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(no subject) [Jul. 7th, 2006|09:33 am]
[feeling | b0red]
[stuck in head |l0ts 0f stuff fr0m my new ip0d!!!!!]

Yay! My first update from my new shiny sexier-than-yours laptop!!! While listening to my amazing shiny new iPod!!! Yaaaay!

Other news... I'm fucking bored about 85% of the time. And no one ever wants to do anything. Damn.

At least I have my shiny new toys to keep me company. Ho hum.
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(no subject) [Jul. 3rd, 2006|11:26 am]
My mother is so annoying. I woke up at 10 and came downstairs where I was instantly interrogated about my wellbeing for 10 minutes. It only ended then because I decided to go back up to bed for an hour. If she hasn't realized after eighteen and a half years that I am not a morning person and that playing 20 Questions isn't something that sits well with me five minutes after I wake up, I think we have a pretty serious problem on our hands. Seriously. *rolls eyes* She hasn't said anything to me since I came back down, but I really don't care. I'm pretty sick of my family. I need to get the hell out of here. I want an ADVENTURE!! I want to go do something awesome!! But I'm the only one who wants that. So... yeah.
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(no subject) [Jul. 1st, 2006|05:47 pm]
[feeling | b0uncy]
[stuck in head |c0llide :: h0wie day]



So yeah, my title was way better, and I think it was a little longer maybe, I can't remember, but we so totally rock. It was in this week's edition of The County Seat, and if anyone has a copy they aren't going to save, can I have it? There's a few people I promised clippings, Doc among them. 

Whoopie! 

Lake for Sunday...
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(no subject) [Jun. 30th, 2006|04:56 pm]
[feeling | surprised]
[stuck in head |i d0 :: better than ezra]

As I always do, as a reflex, I went to check my webmail as soon as I sat at the computer and it wouldn't let me log in. They've officially deleted us... I feel so lost.

Well, okay, so I'm being dramatic. But it was a real shocker, they usually wind up keeping them around until, like, October. Those bastards.

In other news, MY NETFLIX DVDS AREN'T HERE LIKE THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE!!! What the heck am I supposed to do now? Argh!

Going to see Better Than Ezra and Sister Hazel August 23rd with Karl! Yay! Better brush up on those two...

There's someone out there listenin' to the same song
Feelin' the same way that I do
Make me a believer, pick up the reciever
Tell me you feel just like I do, I do

*EDIT*
I found something I'd like to share with you all that my friend Colin wrote in his livejournal. None of you know Colin; we met through Stages two falls ago when he fiddled for us in our cabaret numbers from Fiddler. Anyway, he's very special and this is what he had to say today:

"I pooped something today that was precisely the density of water. I know this because it did not sink nor float, but hovered in the middle just below the surface. Unfortunately, its crystalline structure had the rigidity of a diamond and thus failed to breach the hole that my porcelain throne uses to evacuate the waste therein."

There. Thought you Academites might get some enjoyment out of his scientific analysis of his... feces.

I also thought this was ironic because right before I read this I was watching the Sex and the City episode where Carrie goes to visit her high school boyfriend at the asylum and there's a crazy guy running around  yelling "Feces!! FEEEECEEESS!!!" How much would it rock to get paid all that money to pretend to be crazy and run around yelling "Feces"? I'd totally do it.

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(no subject) [Jun. 29th, 2006|03:27 pm]
[feeling | apathetic]
[stuck in head |back where i was :: j0hn elli0t]

I've spent so much money in the past 2 days it's disgusting. Seriously. Argh. But I'll say "No more mall!!!" for the rest of the summer and stick to it.

Yeah, right.

So yeah. Stuff.

Summer is boring. I wish I worked more.
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(no subject) [Jun. 27th, 2006|01:40 pm]
I think I'm officially registered for classes. I say I think because I'm really hoping I did it right. I have no idea. Shechu helped me decipher the "handbook" which is altogether useless, so hopefully I did it correctly. Hopefully.

Storytelling Strategies (721 Broadway)                W 06:20 - 09:00 PM
                                                                                         T 07:45 - 09:00 PM
Sound Image (721 Broadway)                                 W 09:30 - 03:15 PM
Colloquium (Cantor Film Center)                              T 03:30 - 05:30 PM
Writing the Essay: Plenary (Cantor Film Center) M 07:00 - 09:00 PM
Writing the Essay: Workshop (Bobst Library)   TR 02:00 - 03:15 PM
Elementary French Level 1 (25 W 4th Street)  MTR 09:30 - 10:45 AM

So yeah, not too bad. No classes on Fridays, nothing before 9:30 (which is perfectly fine for me, because I'm usually up before 9 whether I want to be or not) and nothing after 9 ever. *shrug*

I'm excited. I want to go to college, like, now. Mostly because I'm bored off my keister. Blech.
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mleh [Jun. 26th, 2006|09:49 pm]
[feeling | b0red]
[stuck in head |miles apart :: yell0wcard]

I'm bored. I hate summer for the sole reason that I'm always bored. And my movie buddy just went to camp, so I'm basically fucked.

I get to work tomorrow! I've never been so excited.

I need another Clive Cussler book. Rawr.

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(no subject) [Jun. 26th, 2006|12:03 am]
[feeling | thankful]
[stuck in head |but anyway :: blues traveler]

Someday an answer will find us
Quite a long shot, but anyway
I think the past, the past is behind us
Be real confusing if not, but anyway
I put all my hope in tomorrow
It's gonna be great, I can tell, but anyway
I see a new, a new day, a dawning
I like to sleep late, oh well
But anyway..

Hee hee... Jabberwocky.
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(no subject) [Jun. 24th, 2006|05:43 pm]
[feeling | th0ughtful]
[stuck in head |i'll be there f0r y0u :: the rembrandts]

GODDAMIT! This is the third freaking time I’m writing about graduation in my livejournal because IT KEEPS GETTING CLOSED OR SOMETHING!!! RAWR!!!
 
But anyway, breathe. Um, Thursday morning was fun and then the SopDivs and their bass Counterpoint (counterpart, point, ha ha ha) Shoji went to a nice little Thai place for our Last Supper, even though it was really lunch.
 
Graduation itself was… odd. Surreal. Like it was just any other night. Cathy, Isel, Charlie, Wayne and I played Uno. The telecommie boys were being obnoxious. Like it was just an average night. It only really hit me during the anthem. Doc was getting teary-eyed and I realized it was my last performance, my last concert at BCA. I went back to my seat with tears pouring down my face and Greg Donadio actually took my hand to comfort me. He’s someone I never realized I was going to miss; he’s just kind of always been there since kindergarten… Like I said, surreal. The balloons, the beach balls, just genius. And it pissed Mr. Nodarse off something awful. And the end was just… wow.
 
PG was pretty cool too, although I really wish it hadn’t been at Stevens. Singing pop songs and the Vagina Game was the bus ride (I still say I won with “Robin Hood, Men In Vaginas” but it’s debatable) and the buffet was nice too. I got my caricature done with Matthew and then again with Seta, and my tarot and my palm read separately. They were actually pretty in sync with each other, but having read tarot myself I know it’s mostly crap. According to them I’m going to live a healthy life, die at 87, jump right into my career and be extremely successful, money will come and go like water at first but by 27 it won’t even be a problem anymore, and my work will be my life. I’m only going to marry once, for love, a guy named Matt, two years my senior, with light hair and blue eyes and an amazing personality. I ought not to listen to anything anyone says about him because we’re going to be very happy and very much in love, etc. etc. The usual shtick. It was depressing not to be able to go in the pool, especially after Ragone took the blow-up monkey I’d dibsed and took it in the hot tub, not realizing that heat would make the air expand. He was very surprised when the monkey’s head flew off.
 
THEN was the hypnotist. My absolute exhaustion made me extremely easy to hypnotize and I collapsed on Seta’s feet. It was really awesome, I’d totally do it again. It felt like one of those dreams where you’re never really sure if you’re awake or asleep. The highlights: John being pregnant, me smacking Spencer, Yuriy’s walk, Anish’s skip, Noelle weeping because someone “pinched” her bum, John running around the gym crying for his mommy, Ben Smith screwing his fists into his eyes crying No no no no!! when he thought the audience was naked, the talk show… Ahh, it was beautiful. And very very refreshing.
 
Yesterday I pretty much just sat around staring into space or doing stuff that didn’t require me to think about anything. Like my reading list, it was something that required brain activity but didn’t let me think about actual things. I talked to Greg again; he’s decided he’s a moron and that we should be friends. Again. Seriously? I’ll believe it when I see it. Loser. I guess I’ll give him a shot. Again. Because I’m too nice for my own damn good.
 
Still haven’t realized I graduated. The SopDiv shirts came in, and I keep thinking I’ll just give Alexis’ hers on Monday. But I’m not going to see her on Monday. And it’s weird to think that saying goodbye to some people it might actually be goodbye. As in I’m never going to see them again. It’s so weird. So surreal. Wow. 

I really enjoyed Mrsdr. Crane's email, so I'm going to paste it here. She wasn't so bad, in the end. I guess.

EMAIL! )

Brooke’s party was fun yesterday. Lots of 90’s pop which made me really happy. And Adam’s party was very enjoyable. Got to see Dave (15!!!) and Joeymylove and I actually talked to Robin. Which is a little weird in my head, but she’s really nice. And I’m probably going to be seeing a lot of her in the coming years so I guess I’ll get used to it. I’m so happy that works out.
 
And now I’m home by myself. I’ll either go curl up with another Clive Cussler novel or watch a movie or something. Who cares. I should probably write thank you notes. Which is really just a huge waste of paper and I’m thinking I might just do my family. Because I’m a teenager, and I glance at thank you notes once and throw them out. If anyone specifically wants a thank you note, inform me now. Otherwise, you probably won’t get one.
 
So yeah… I have to go learn my cantor music for tomorrow, ‘cause I get to do half a mass and then I have Mattie’s party. *sigh*
 
It struck me last night how really true these lyrics are. I love you all. BCA06: Always in my heart.
 
No one could ever know me
No one could ever see me
Since you’re the only ones who know
What it’s like to be me
Someone to face the day with
Make it through all the rest with
Someone I’ll always laugh with
Even at my worst, I’m best with you
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